Happy Birthday to Me!

So here is just a short follow up to yesterdays post. This birthday was pretty much as boring if not more boring than my last one, with one little exception. I woke up and had a doctors appointment, and dropped off some "birthday" donuts to my department at the clinic so I wouldn't get razzed for not bringing a birthday treat.

Then I went out and bought myself a birthday present. I decided that in honor of my 26th birthday I deserved diamonds. So I bought myself a diamond right hand ring that I have been drooling over for the last three years. When I walked into the store and saw that is was 75 percent off on clearance I knew it was time to make it mine.

Then I went home and made my own birthday cake, yellow with chocolate frosting. Then my parents took me out for dinner. They actually tried to get me to have one alcoholic beverage, but I was too afraid to chance it with any alcohol after my surgery so I had water, and soup....and my birthday sundae. Complete with song and full on embarrassment.

The Day Before The Dip

So today is February 4th. My birthday is February 5th, tomorrow, and tomorrow I will turn 26, and officially begin my descent down the hill toward 30. Now don't get me wrong I am not freaking out about it or anything 26 is still young. Its just that now I am on the other side of 25, that happy little middle ground where your not quite pushing 30. And starting tomorrow, I will officially be pushing 30.

It probably wouldn't bother me at all if I wasn't bothered by the rest of my life. You know the no husband and 2.5 children part gets to be a little more annoying at this age. I never finished college like I planned on. I am working an "ok" job I guess, but I could do better. And oh yeah, I LIVE WITH MY PARENTS!!!! I am working on remedying that last one here soon, but you know it doesn't help matters at all. Oh well, I started this blog with no particular game plan or exit strategy. So in conclusion, Happy Birthday to me.

Tonsillectomy Do's and Dont's

So since its been a little over a week since I had my tonsils viciously yanked from the back of my throat, and had my deviated septum fixed I decided it was probably time for me to write a little blog about my experience.

So as far as I know my surgery went really well. I woke up in the recovery room feeling like I had swallowed shrapnel and then reached up for my nose, which had no bandages on it. I think at that point I said something probably strange sounding to the recovery room nurse asking if he even corrected my nose. Which he did, and he didn't lie about that not hurting, I was fortunate enough to not have any pain associated with the septoplasty (horay). But I made up for the lack of septoplasty pain with tonsil pain.

So after having almost two cups worth of ice chips in the recovery room we were off to my hospital room that I would be spending the night in. As soon as they got me off of the gurney I suddenly became as hot as a menopausal woman on the 4th of July. I was sweating like nobodies business and then I had to puke, so that should have set the tone for my week. Then after the nurses got me into my bed, I kicked all the covers off and had them put my hair up in a very haphazard rubber band pony tail to help me cool off.

Then after that they brought me my pain medication it was a liquid narcotic called Roxicet and it was my savior, especially considering that I just threw up....you know after tonsil surgery...stomach acid, open wound, you get the picture it hurt like hell. Then it was time to parade my family in, and for me to pass out. Around ten after my parents left (and several doses of pain meds later) it was time for me to go to the bathroom and clean up for the night. Now mind you I was under the impression that I would get a little help since I was drugged up with an IV in my arm, but I thought wrong.

So I was put in the bathroom with a "bath in a bag" and left to my own devices to clean up and change into a new gown. Ok, no big deal. The cleaning up went slow, but it was ok. And then it was time to put a gown on. Now they handed me a gown that had none of the sleeve snaps done up so I had to snap them together. And I had an IV in my arm, so its not like I could just slip my arm into it. So I crack the bathroom door to look for help. No help in sight. So I stick my arm in there and try to button it up while holding it up with my teeth and trying to stay in the upright and locked position. So finally after about 5 minutes I managed to figure my gown out and went out to tuck myself into bed.

The nice RN came into my room and slipped a little Demerol into my IV. Oh sweet demerol how I love you, it made me fall right asleep. So the night went pretty well I just had to get up about every two hours to pee (constant IV fluids will do that) and get new ice for the ice packs on my neck.

So skip the boring shit, night went fine yada yada. Woke up and got flowers from my co workers blah blah. Then they brought me scrambled eggs and hash browns for breakfast. HELLO I just had my tonsils out and you want me to eat that?!?!? I tried half heartedly a couple eggs, then I made the nurse bring me jello. Later after I had chocked down lunch (scalloped potatoes and ham). The nice nurse lady went to give me one last dose of demerol to make my drive home comfortable. As soon as she finished putting it in, it was like WHAM, suddenly I jerked upright and thought for sure I was about to puke again. But then nothing happend, and they sent me home about a half hour later. Lesson learned here: Demerol not always my friend.

So on the car ride home, I managed to throw up three times, thank god they sent me with a puke bag. When I got home, it was time for more Roxicet, sweet roxicet. However after taking it and a short nap I started what would become the longest night of my life. I threw up more Wednesday night then I think I have thrown up in my whole life. Any attempt to have any food or water was immediately thwarted with me puking. So naturally I became very dehydrated and got a wicked headache.

By that point my sore throat was not my big issue, it was the puking and the headache. So after that my mother called the hospital and spoke to the ENT on call. Now this genius thought that making me take suppositories was going to stop me from throwing up. So after my dad got back from the drug store, I had to assume the position to add insult to injury and have my mother shove a little bullet up my ass ( which burned like hell by the way). Well much to my not amazement the little suppository didn't do shit, so it was off to the emergency room.

When I got there much to my disappointment the worst ER doc ever was on duty. I know this since I work for the hospital and I have worked with him in the past, he thinks everyone is a drug seeker, and has had more complaints then any other provider in the system (good guy). Well luckily my uncle the nurse practitioner that works in the hospital had called ahead and talked to him, so I had no problems at all. So three bags of IV fluids and some anti nausea meds later I went home.

So I spent the rest of my recovery time taking kids tylenol for the tonsillectomy pain. Kids tylenol. KIDS TYLENOL!!! That's like putting a band aid on a bullet wound. But since the good stuff made me puke my guts out (even looking at the bottle makes my stomach flip) that's what I had to work with.

Well that concludes the interesting part of my story, so I wont bore with anymore details. Here is Inga's list of Tonsillectomy Do's and Dont's

1. Don't over-do the ice chips in the recovery room
2. Do ask for help when its time for a new gown
3. Demerol is not your friend
4. Don't eat scrambled eggs for your first meal
5. Don't take the roxicet, its not worth it
6. Do get the junior strength dissolving tylenol tabs they are bubble gum flavored
7. Don't let anyone talk you into using a suppository for nausea
8. Do use the ice bags on your neck it helps

Three types of Showers

So I have decided that there are three types of showers that we all take (thanks Ava for reminding me this weekend).

The Quick Shower- That "oh shit" quick shower that you take when you wake up 15 minutes before you have to be somewhere and your already running late. Your lucky if the soap is rinsed off and you remember to wash your hair.

The Normal Shower- The shower that you would regularly take, doing your normal washing, shampooing and yada yada.

And Finally....

The Sex Shower- That shower that you take when you even think that you might be getting some action. You clean every nook and cranny. You leave no "stone" unturned. No leg or arm pit hair unshaven. Bikini line manicured like the white house lawn. The shower to end all showers, you may even spend so much time in there you come out wrinkled... but very clean.


So that is my take on personal hygiene. Enjoy.

Christmas as You Get Older

So I have noticed gradually over the years that the older you get Christmas just gets a little bit more boring. You have those really young "hooray I got a barbie" years. Then you get older and its CD's and DVD's; and other such electronic goodies.

But then this magical thing happens after you turn 18, and it keeps getting worse as you get older. Suddenly you find yourself asking for housewares and gift cards to Wal-Mart, to buy more stuff for the home. I went from getting a new Walkman (yes I am that old) to getting a microwave, and pots & pans. One year I was just giddy over Teflon coated air bake pans and new sheets for my bed.

So this year, I got a new coffee maker, a george forman grill ( with removable plates) and a new feather bed!! My younger cousin's keep asking me why I want and get such "boring" stuff for Christmas, and I keep telling them "wait and see".

Mobile Maven

So since I have all my bills paid off, and I am living with my parents....and I am almost 26; I decided that since I am living with mom and dad I may as well start to put money aside for a down payment on a house, or in my case maybe a house on wheels.

I have been thinking about it, and I could either buy a little crappy house, or like the nicest trailer in the park. For about $80,000 I can have a "cozy bungalow" in a questionable neighborhood. And for $40,000 I can have one of the nicest "homes" in Kingsfield Estates (sounds good I know, but if you live here you know its a trailer park). My sister laughed at me and said I would be "trailor trash", but I say nay nay.

If I do end up buying a mobile home, it will be a very nice one, with a jaccuzi tub, newer appliances and hardwood flooring (the one I am looking at has it). Not a little old one with rust on it that you could buy for around $7,000. No folks if I end up purchasing a trailer, I will not be trailer trash, I will be a mobile maven!

Happy New Year?

Wow I just realized that its been waaay to long since I have written a blog. But fear not you one or two people that ever read this, I will catch you up on all of the not exciting goings on in the life of Inga. I am having a tonsillectomy and a deviated septum repair here in a couple of weeks. So we can look forward to blogs I can write in a hydracodone induced haze.

So in December I finally got my apartment in the "big city" re-rented. After I posted several ads in craigslist and on other online classifieds, I am reasonably certain that they went ahead and filled the 4 other open one bedrooms before they filled mine ( those bastards). But on a happy note, I am now paying A LOT of money towards bills that I owe, so that's all good.

New Years eve just gets less and less fun every year. I mean I am only 25 so its not like I am ancient but sometimes I feel ancient. Like on New Years eve this year, we gathered at a friends house and watched Dick Clark's rockin new years eve and wondered who Ryan Seacrest and Kellie Pickler had to blow to get on the show. Poor Dick Clark, he must be so embarrassed to see what used to be an eeehhh alright new years eve program turn to crap with Seacrest. I mean honestly, doesn't that tool have enough jobs? Why not have Gary Busey run it? At least then we could laugh at him because he is bat-shit crazy. And maybe they could arrange for some performers that cater to the over 17 crowd?

Anywho, bitching about sub-par New Years Eve entertainment aside, after watching the ball drop at 11PM my time, we decided that we should probably make an appearance at a bar. So we went to the only bar we could handle on a big night like that, a martini bar. After sitting around for about a half hour and drinking our complementary midnight champagne, we decided that we were all way to tired to stay out any later and headed out for the night. Not without making a quick stop at the gay bar to say hi to some people, and further affirm that unfortunately I am just too old for this shit. At least on a work day....